A 2 day.

On Friday something bad happened in the noon and I went to Bamboo at night. And I slept in the car after that for only 2 hours and went back home to take a shower and then without any rest headed out to Aeon for a movie Painted Skin. Then after that dressed up in the car and then headed to Sunway Pyramid to meet up with Kimberly and the rest. U-Mae and jie was already in Euphoria. So we entered and had fun. I went there with William, Janus and Sze Guan then meet up with the rest.


Janus and me outside Euphoria.


Janus's hand.


Inside Euphoria.


Deep purple?


Me.


Hot hot panas panas sweaty sweaty.


The Birthday Gurl !


Thats weird.

Not lastly I wanna wish Happy Birthday to my jie and my other rest.


Happy Birthday Jie ! Hope you enjoyed the night the other day. =)


Happy Birthday to Eevon which is on the 28th of September. The girl on the left.


Happy Birthday to Lainey Lee which is on 29th of September which is today. Hope you are enjoying your day and time right now.

Till then.

Tagged.

By Lainey Lee Guem Guem.

Like any tag, it comes with a set of rules. In this case, the rule are as follows:
-State 15 weird things/habits/little known facts of yourself.
-The 10 people I tag are to then to follow my footsteps and write their own 15 weird things/habits/little known facts about yourself.
-No tag backs.

1.I love caps and collect them slowly to keep as my collections during my life time.

2.I got a small pillow to hug whenever I sleep at night.

3.I always pang sai after I go for a mamak session I think? Most of the time.

4.I always am a gay.

5.I am a retard.

6.When Im bored, I used to surf the same pages over and over again for 1 hour.

7.I have headaches if I smell something strong or hear music loud for a long time or bright lights are on.

8.I am fat.

9.I like biting straws at times.

10.I love my blog.

11.I love to collect things.

12.I suck at taking pictures with other people.

13.I feel shy meeting people the first time.

14.I do whatever I want or like to do.

15.I rot at home all the time. Like now.

Tag:
No one.

Catacombs.

Today watched a movie called Catacombs. Before that was choosing either to watch Catacombs or MammaMia. Did I spell it correct? I dunno. So we choosed Catacombs. The title looked great. They said on the poster what ah.. Below the city of lights, Exist a world of darkness. So I thought that it would be a great show. The main actor a girl gone to Paris because the sister asked her to go. Then they went shopping then at night they went for a party underground the cities of Paris. The underground cave was made out of skeleton heads and the ground is also made out of that. So by the title I thought that the show is gonna be a horror show so I was ready to close my eyes anytime if anything appeared out suddenlly. So the shows go on. The cave was quite scary and then well they said about Anti-Christ and then they trained a child to be the devil I think? By making him go loco. So the show is about this girl been chased by this loco so called Anti-Christ and I thought that it was real. Manatau in the end of the show. The actors inside just said that it was a prank what blah blah blah. That they used on everybody that is new to this thing. So the main actor the girl who been running around the tunnels underground killed her sister and all her friends. Then she walked out to the cities covering with blood and everybody looking at her and went into a taxi and told the taxi driver to go to the airport so she can go back to her home town and then the story ends. I was like har?? What kind of movie is this. The creature looks so scary and real mana tau it was just a prank. So so so sien. But it was scary la with a guy like me cant watch horror movies. Har har. But it was a fun day.

Im sorry to Beatrice Chin Yuen Xin that i didnt wished her in time ! I was too busy all the time nowadays. So sorry ya.


Happy Birthday !

We go way back.

Things that I didnt not know and found out.

Recently I found out some stuffs that happened. At first I didnt expect it to be that way until that day i heard about it. I didnt know that it can be like that. I thought those kind of things wont happen but now I know that it really does happens. Those things that were talked to me made me a little heated up but I put my mind together and thought to myself properly. Why should i be bothered? It is just them not me. My part was not out and thiers are. If they wanna think it that way what can I do? They wanna change minds towards me what can I do right? Its just that way. I mean I dont do anything. I tried to do but somethings you just cant do it right? I just learned that somethings are just not meant to be done. Sometimes I should just let it go but I still dont give up easily on going for it. I kept my mouth shut all the time like how we made the promise that time. But guess what? The other side did not keep the promise and now I know why those eyes are on me. Now I know what exactly happened. I wanna thank you the person who told me. You know who you are. And I wont mention a single name out here so dont worry. Its okay. No one will know because after what I heard I still keep my mouth shut. I was furious at first but then later on I got a call and those words really made me chilled down I guess? What is said is what is said. Let them judge. But all the people I know, knows exactly what is it. So I dont need to worry about them. Those others are just small flyes around so why do I wanna be bothered? Let them be. Let them do what they want. Let them think what they want. Let them say what they want. All I care is what I have to take care and what do I have in my possesion now. Its mine and Im happy with what I have. I treasure what I really have now. I dont want anything more or complain about anything because this is all I have. I dont need to be greedy to want more from what Im having. Its okay already. I will let it rest in peace. It doesnt really bother me now because I can finally look overall. 1 more year left and everything goes to a rest.

A friend spoke to me the other day. And I can say his words were right.
I have shelter,
I have food,
I have drink,
what do I want more?
I can be happy with what I have,
without expecting anything more,
Im okay with what I have.



Do not think about the past.
Do not think whats gonna happen next week.
Do not think whats gonna happen next month.
Do not think whats gonna happen next year.
Just think that how much enjoyment and fun are you going through the next day of your life.

I can say that what he says is true and kept me focusing now more. I can say that Im not fully healed but so what? I have my Daddy around. I have my close friends around. Let them say what they want. Let them judge what they want. I have my own family now and nobody is gonna stop me from doing anything. I treasure them because I dont wanna lose another family again. Its my family now and they love and take care of me. They accepted for who am I and accepted me for what am I and willing to love me with a open heart. What more do I want from that? I know that I dont understand the meaning of love from the beginning of my life. But Im trying my best to learn and understand what is love all about. Im inmature and raw now. Im just taking small steps understanding everything about family slowly without rushing but a slow and steady pace. Im happy with what I have now. And I just be myself and be the best of me all the time. And that should do the work and Im gonna start working hard from now onwards because soon everything is gonna be putted on me. Just everything so I must be ready by that time. I got the time. I got the stuffs. I can do it. Im not giving up now. I cant turn back now. So Im heading forward and forward towards my goal.

Think twice.

Tomorrow is Monday and its a schooling day. And today when i was ready to start over again. Something just have to pull me down again right? Everybody was not there when i needed them at my major time. I keep on telling myself not to be pulled down not to be pulled down. I dont wanna get pulled down now. The way you talk just pulls me down all the way to the same spot. What the hell is wrong with you. Sometimes i do think to myself do you even think about other people at first? There is no sense of care or thinking if you is it. Sure a little of brains can already right. I hope i wont get pulled down at this time. Its almost going to bed and im getting pulled down? I must be positive now positive positive.

Treasure something before you lose them.

As someone told me 3 weeks back. People dont know how to treasure something until they lose them from thier hands. I finally realize that what she said is true. 3 weeks back she told me that once a person made her mind they wont turn back. Maybe now im finally trust and believe what she said. Its getting different day by day. Some days i had hopes. Some days i had nothing. Some days i really lose it all. Its so confusing. Until yesterday. I got everything up together. Once again. When i get all these things. It will be always a Sunday. A boring Sunday when nobody is around me for the whole day. No one to talk to. No one to care for. No one to even have fun with. Its so quiet here. Maybe it will rain and make the water sounded like they were dancing. But if not its all quiet. And time on Sundays passes really slow i realize. When i want time to pass fast, it passes real slow. When i want time to pass slow it passes real fast. Its always the opposite you know. All these days i realze alot of things that i did not knew yet. We dont always get what we want and we dont always get it in our way. I also learned that relationships are something hard to handle? A little bit they would just let it go. Hmm. I just dont get but i came to a conclusion that is Never to fall in love but just fool around. Yes. I realize at this age we should do that more but not get too serious. Someone im really sad for and i hope that she will be happy once again. Like i said to her. Its time to wake up and improve yourself. But am i really doing it when i tell other people to ? Like what my other friend told me. You may tell people to do that do this. But you will never listen to your own advise. Thats quite true ? I always tell my dad to be more positive thinking but i myself is a negative thinker ? I dont think too much of a positive things but more into negative thoughts ? I also learned that I am a person that has a hard time accepting things when it is bad. I take a very very very long time to overcome it i guess? I dunno am i strong or am i weak. But all i know is im a sissy. I dont like the pain. But maybe this is my pay back for what i did for not treasuring properly when i had the chance to ? One of my classmate always tell me that he believes in karma. Come to think of it. Karma might be a true thing after all. Whatever you do now. Reflects you in the future or in the present. Or am i just avoiding the fact that i am not good enough and lose it all ? Maybe i should stop avoiding it now. Its kind of hard to keep your feelings to yourself i think ? Stand alone in this world and keeping everything inside you not letting anybody know. I realize its not easy as it was. Like they always said. Everybody needs a close friend or loved ones beside them. To talk to. To care for. To have fun with. To be happy with. To go around with. A person that is always there for you. Maybe in this world. There is no such thing living alone? Everybody needs someone in the end after all. In this world living alone maybe you cant survive by yourself ? Maybe? Maybe not? There are alot of maybes and maybe not. Know or dont know in this world now. Everytime i want it to be how it used to be but something is just different. Maybe now she is not there all the time anymore ? Said to be im always here for you. But maybe i alone noticed that you have left some behind after all ? Or maybe you are just being there for a pathetic person like me ? I dunno what you are thinking. I dunno thats why i dare not say i just think and always with the maybes. Or maybe you just really dont give a damn anymore ? I always wonder with myself before going to sleep on my bed looking at the ceilling with the lights off thinking over and over again. Think about how it used to be. How we talked. How we met. I always thought of it over and over again. And i can say that i miss those moments but maybe its too late already? I went to my friend's friend's blog and i saw her title was It is never too late to apologize, just start with a Sorry. Is that true? In this world most of the time sorries just cant settle anything anymore. Like those gang fights. You say sorry but you still get beaten up in the end. Maybe its really too late and i cant do anything to save it anymore? I always thought i can do something do anything to change the situation. But maybe in the end i thought to myself that i cant do anything at all ? Its like you have given up on me. You dont hope to give me a second chance to redeem myself so that i can make you happy once again. The way you talk is like its not you anymore. Will it make a difference if i would just walk out of your life now? I wonder that alot. Do you really give a care about it. Many many people tell me just to forget about it and they are there for me. But sometimes do you know how old you are even you are fourteen. When you love someone so much that it can kill you and also effect the people around you ? I believe it can. If just you can put some faith in me again i would show you that everything can be repaired to the way it was. And i can be happy. There are so many If's. But those if's are rarely to happen. Miracles doesnt happen just like that in this world anymore. I rarely see miracles anymore. Its like its all gone to the drains then to the river and to the sea and to far far away. Few days ago you said differently and now you said things differently too ? Are you serious or what ? You can just change so fast huh ? Maybe falling in love in this age really makes someone go crazy. Maybe its better just to fool around then having a serious relationship ? If you wanna have a serious relationship then dont love so much but love one or two quaters only. I now know this. I might as well believe it too i guess. You might say nothing's changed but do you realise you just dont talk to me the way you are last time ? Everytime you just walk away from the conversation just like that. You dont do that last time. You just left me there alone just like that. You never do that before. And you never really came to me anymore for anything. You might say this and that to me but do you realise that you really dont need me around ? Before i came in it was like this too right. So if i was out now it would not make anything difference also right? And do you know you say that you say not to do that or not to do this. But actually you never really did anything. Its what i wanna do you just let it be that way. Is that really a close friend for? I wonder you changed so much and you said nothing has changed. I dunno how you feel because you always keep it from me. Maybe at times you just need to tell me so that i can feel more calm, more patience and more secure. But you dont at all. I dont wanna be selfish myself so i let you decide what you wanna do or say. But have you ever thought of me ? I wonder about that. Maybe you did not. You said i think too much. I know i do. But how about you? You think alot too. Maybe thats why it did not work out? Maybe you just think too much and dont wanna let it go and putting it in your heart? Its not about our attitude or our maturity or about our not giving in. We should try to repair things first before saying all that. You didnt give me time to really fix things up. You didnt really give me anything so that i could just fix things up to the way how it used to be. You just left without saying anything. Or without doing anything. Maybe you are just making fun of me. Maybe i dont know what you are thinking. I can say that i break down more often now? Maybe if you just give in to this matter. It might change everything but i know that you wont. So its useless asking you anymore. What you say that time. I dunno to believe it anot anymore. By the way you are now. Its better to fool around than really going serious. Maybe thats true. One of my friend once told me. As long as she is happy then its okay. Yes i do agree with you for what you said to me. I do agree alot. So now im hiding everything to myself rather than telling her just to make her happy right? Its better this way. I wont screw things up. Come to think of it my other friend told me that i deserve better or many people told me that. But to me you cant just simply say it that way. You cant just judge by seeing whats outside. Maybe she has her own reasons that she is keeping to herself? And not telling anybody? Many people tell me to get over it. I agree i need to get over it. Yes i do. So i might just get over it just it will take a very long time. You cant expect a person to just get over something in one day or one week or one month right. It might take a long time. So lets wait till that time comes. There are no more chances. No more hopes. No more prayers to be done. I do what i could and i can but if she is just like that. What more can i do ? But i believe that you can do more and more. But right now i dunno where am i heading or what am i gonna do. Well. I can say that you made me realize alot of things from what happened. And you made me very happy when the moments i was with you. I wanna say thank you for everything that you have did. You did alot of things for me and whats around me is better with your presence around. So thank you alot. And you are someone that can really make me realize more things and change myself. For the good but away from the bad. Thank you for everything you have did for me. I didnt want to give up. But well you made me give up on you.

Pathology.

You are not alone !

Today went to pyramid to watch pathology. It was okay. But if you are scared of blood then dont watch or digusting things i think you better not watch. Well the Peter guy in Heroes is inside the show. Many many twist turn quite okay la not bad? If you got patience then you watch la. If not better not. Hehe. Till then.

Har har !

She ain't got no money in the bank ! ! ! ! ! !

School was normal. Boring Monday. Thinking about its so long to Friday and Saturday just kills me ? Har har. Exams are shifted to 6th of October if Im not mistaken or 22nd of October? Im not sure. Not sure also the teacher talk blur blur one. Har har.

I must be happy.

But this thought bothers me. Are all guys the same ? Hmm hmm hmm hmm hmm.

Till then.

Tan Soon Chia.

Thank you for the post Soon Chia. And I wont kill you for that because not many people do that just for me. Hehe. Only close friends like you and the rest will do that for me alright. So dont need to be scared or sorry. Har har.

You are a good friend to me if you dunno.
Maybe Im just busy with my other friends that I didnt really go out with you anymore?
Im sorry if I didnt really hang out with you anymore.
And i know Im quite a negative person with alot of negative thoughts.
And thanks for thinking that I am always trying to change myself.

Well, Thanks for the push.
Im now trying to be happy with what i got.
Like you said this what makes life challenging and fun.
I agree with you.
You are a good friend by my side at times.

Remember the times we used to talk alot on messenger?
Well, exams are coming soon? October?
So, lets wait till exams is over and maybe we can find a job together?
I hope we all can work together someday?

Maybe after high school we might find each other working in the same company?
We dunno anything yet right?
So I wanna say thank you and sorry for everything.
I know that I have been an ass.
And I hope you will forgive me for that.
I might do things but I wont leave you aside.

So thank you for the pictures. I didnt know I got those pictures taken ? Im very thankful for you for that. Har har ! I got no pictures to post up ! Sorry.

Mooncake Festival.

I went to ACS, my school on Saturday night around 5pm? Interact Club of ACS organized this Mooncake Festival Event. There were performances by my friends. Acoustic singing as well as keyboard and also a solo dance. Well the event went smooth without anything wrong going on. I went out half way with Gavin to Aeon for a while. Then after that i head back to ACS then i went back home with Robyn. And then i waited for J shawn and the rest to get to esso then i went there. The day was okay. But i heard Moocake Festival by my dad that is was a tradition that the chinese army use mooncakes to send secret messages inside so that the enemy wont know? Or when they won the battle, the general made mooncakes for the villagers as a celebration ? Im not sure. There are two versions so i dunno which one and im not sure myself didnt really look up on this matter. Hehe. Anyway the crowd at ACS was good enough? Filled up the chairs and made quite a profit out of it? So it was kind of okay. Till then.

Same.

I got this thought to my head just only today. Is all guys the same ? Been thinking about it for the past half an hour havent really got the answer. Will be bothering me the whole day tomorrow too. Mooncake Festival at grandma's place was okay. Got to eat home made food once again after a long long time. Happy to see grandma's smile again. Shes smiling and is living healthy ? So i got nothing to worry about her for now. Not long i have to worry about her again. After that went home then went for a drink with J- Shawn. Then got back home. I really hate Sundays sometimes. Really got nothing to do one. No work to do. No studies to do. No where to go. Just stuck at home to sleep. Can it get anymore boring here? Hmm. School is tomorrow and i have too much time to clean up the house. So I am ready already. Till then.

High School Life.

I always wonder if i would miss my high school life anot. I wonder now. I dont think i will now. But last time i am always afraid of finishing school as life in high school was great and it was fun. Sometimes you dont need to go to school. You can do what you want. You can skip classes if you want. You always have your friends around you. But somehow now i want to end my high school life faster. I know i will miss it but everyone has to go through it right? No escapes. And i dont think i will be having a college life but straight into working life maybe? Or part time study? har har. But i cant wait to finish school now. I see all my friends working now. They are having fun. But well. Ending school was something i was afraid to do. But not anymore. Hehehehe. I cant wait i cant wait for next year. My last year in my school. Lets end it and enjoyyyyyy.

School today was sucky. I felt so tired that my shoulders would just drop on the floor anytime. And i felt it was hard to breath air into my lungs. My eyes were all blue black and bengkak and i can feel that it went smaller than usual. I think this is the effects due to not sleeping the whole night then. Since i experienced it before. I dont think i will try to do it again. Not adviseble. Har har. Till then.

I am so tired.

I did not get to sleep the whole night yesterday. I was on the computer till 1.30 am and i went to bed. And when i get to bed i cant seem to sleep even i closed my eyes for like 1 hour. Time on the bed passes very fast compared to us doing activities that time. Hours by hours the time passed and it was finally 4 am. So i could not sleep and guess what? A cockroach fell beside of me where i was laying down.. and yeap i heard something fell so i took my phone as a torch light and saw a cockroach so i hurry hurry get down of the bed and took the spray and spray it away and guess what it came to my leg. So i got fed up and decided to turn on my computer and watch JabbaWockeez for 2 hours till 6 am and now im blogging. Im getting ready to go to school and im gonna eat my breakfast after this. I think i am gonna suffer in school today due to lack of sleep. I am so lucky that today is Tuesday and i get to go back at 12.45 pm. Which i can skip Biology class. I cant wait for school to end so i can come home and sleep like a cow. And i have not done any of my homework yet. I am too busy with my activities and i sleep like a cow in the noon which stops me from studying or doing any of my work. So its only at night. And i am quite forgetful of my work and sometimes i put all those worksheets in my plastic folder and forget to take them out to do. So i got to rush my school work today in school. And i hope i can pass up in time. I need to photostat things too. And Lauren, I want my Lollipop. Hehehehe.

September Babies.

I just wanna wish Happy birthday to those are borned on the month of September.


Aravind which is on 1st of September.


Adrian Lee which is on 3rd of September.


Nushka Lim which is on 4th of September.


Tan U-Mae which is on 6th of September/.


Kelvin Koh which is on the 9th of September.


Jonure which is on the 10th of September.


Samantha which is on the 11th of September.


Sherlyn which is on the 11th of September.


Ahmad Nadhir which is on the 11th of September.


Melody Teo which is on the 12th of September.


Donovan Yeo which is on the 15th of September.


Chin Wu Yan which is on the 15th of September.


Lydia Phuah which is on the 16th of September.


Kok yam which is on the 16th of September.


Jeff which is on 16th of September.


Lil Funky which is on the 17th of September.


Jacinta which is on the 19th of September.


Alvis which is on the 20th of September.


Victor Chan which is on the 22nd of September.


Beatrice Chin which is on the 23rd of September.

Eng Khoon which is on the 23rd of September.


Nicholas Chia which is on the 25th of September.


Nadelyn Lim which is on 25th of September.


Michelle Wong which is on the 28th of September.

Ng Kai Ling which is on the 28th of September.


Elaine Lee which is on the 29th of September.

Victor Ng which is on the 30th of September.

I think this is all of them. Im not sure. Till then.

My birthday.

Today is my sweet sixteen. Im Offically Sixteen now. Its been 10 years since then. 10 years i have been what i am now. I can say that if i was not saved by my dad i might not have been for what i am. Im really grateful for what i have been. Life has been not that good towards me but what can i say? I cant blame anyone. I cant blame God. I cant blame anyone but myself. I cant hate my life for being like this but yes there are many times when i did really break down on myself and yet i have to collect and take up all the pieces by myself. I was not have been taken care well since i was 1 to 6. I was left at some house somewhere far far away from Klang which is Cheras. And not seeing any of my family members. Yes my childhood was not that happy and cheerful. But im thankful that God gave me my Dad now. I was taken at the age of 6. And now its been 10 years im offically with my Dad. If i was not taken at the age of 6. Where could have i been ? What am i gonna be ? What will i gonna be ? How will i be that time ? I will never know but all i know is its gonna be worse than what i am now. I have not many happy moments in my life. And there are a little of happy moments in my life. I have more downs than the ups that people usually get. I understand and get that a person must go through what the other person feels to totally understand what that person had experienced and felt all these while. Im always trying my best to be better for everyone. Im always trying my best to not dissapoint everyone. I never gave up my life just like that. Even how bad was my past was i never gave up my life that easily because i know i still have my Dad around me i had to do the job that he did for me. He picked me over a girl that he was gonna marry. How good is that? Even how much he hitted me during the past. Even how much he scolded me during the past. Its all for my own good. I cant say that i hate him because he is just teaching me how to survive in my life. He is just trying to tell what life is really is in the future. He is getting me prepared for my future. I cant hate him for that or sometimes he got too angry and start hitting me non stop. Well its everyone needs i can say. You need pain so you can learn. No pain no gain. True? Yes very true. I can say that my sweet sixteen was not good or fun at all. Yes and yes it will be fun. But not as fun as the past years. This may be the worst and suckiest sweet sixteen i ever had after what had happened last week. Exactly one week before my birthday. How sucky is that huh? And yes. I have no mood to do anything or i have lost my interest in everything. If only i have not done my mistakes. I might be just enjoying my time right now? Like what U-Zhing said. When you have it you will never think or use your brains properly. When you really lose it you will really think it over again and realise what you have done wrong. I still want to put that smile on. I still want to make the warmness. I still want to make the laughters. I still want to miss. I still cant let it go. Still cant do it yet. Everytime when i come home at night late night. I always dislikes the time when i get home at night. I always feel lonely that nobody is around. My house has not much noise all the time. No laughter going on. No noise going on. Not much fun going on or anger. It is just plain dull boring. It just suddenlly everything has dissapeared. The lonelyness that was here last time is back. Yes I do worry alot yes Im weak and Im scared of many things Yes. Maybe that is who i am ? Maybe that is what made Randy Swee all these time? Maybe that is what i am really is ? I always try to change the fact that i worry too much. Yes i do think alot. I think alot before doing something. I think alot before saying something. I do i do its all because of what happened before in my life and i just dislike to be alone. But sometimes its just better to stand alone? Or just be in a relationship with a person you really love and care for to put everything on her? The one that you can really take it easy on and be comfortable with when all hard times are on you? Well. Life doesnt goes on what you want. Somehow somewhere sometime it just turns around and poke you in the back. Okay okay my day. 12 am my sweet sixteen started.. and i just played a few dota games with soya and well thanks soya for the company.. then slept at 3am then woke up at 11am or 12pm not sure.. around there.. then i see all those wishes in my phone.. thanks alot yaaa.. was asleep so i cant really reply you all.. sooooo.. i replied them and woke up and bathed neatly as it was my day.. then i waited for my friends to finish thier school day and then i called them and some called me and we went to selva some mamak near mgs school or just opposite mgs school and we had our lunch there.. all together there was janus, jerry, soon chia, j shawn and me there.. so we talked talked eat eat eat drink drink drink till around 5? then jerry, soon chia and j shawn went to robyn's house by thier bicycles so left me and janus walking back to my house.. then at my house we danced a while talked a while then he went back because he had to go somewhere.. thanks for your company man.. i took my bathe and then dressed up properly then asked my dad to send me to Robyn's house at 5 plus? almost 6.. went there and they were still baking the cup cakes.. okay la.. talked with the mom.. then slowly and slowly watch tv and waited for the time to pass.. then around 8.20pm after they bathed all Robyn's mom send us to Su ching's house reached there around 8.40pm.. they were all waitting for us so Preveen, Tommy, Elaine, Jerry, Nushka, Jennifer, Irene, Ernest, Kenneth, Soon chia, Robyn, Yan teng, and of course Su ching was there. I hope i dont miss out any names. If i dunno sorry la okay. Too many and too long ago cant remember.. so they did a suprise for both me and Nush.. Nush's birthday was on the 4th and mine was on the 5th.. so we celebrated together.. Thanks for the suprise! Currently i dont have the photos with me so i will post them up later on.. then after that got roast chicken, roast beef, potato with cheese and bacon i think? and mushroom soup so eat eat eat all.. thena round 9.20pm i got one call from my brother said that he wants me to go to aeon now so i had to leave.. Sorry all for leaving so early okay? So i hugged them all and called my dad to pick me up from her house to go to Aeon.. reached Aeon around 10 went to see my brother and he was not out of work yet.. so do Colin and Roy, Michelle, Wynesse, Khairul and Topac was already in Station one dunno doing what there.. so after that 10.30pm end work all go to Station one. All together was William, Roy, Colin, Topac, Wynesse, Michelle, Gavinn i hope its the right spelling? , Sam and Khairul.. i hope thats all? Sorry if i forget again.. so Wynesse had to go back at 11pm.. so he sent Topak back to bus stop so he could go back and Khairul followed her.. then it drizzled so we had to move inside.. and guess who i saw? Vin Teng.. shocking.. i didnt expect to see her there.. well saw her said hi.. then moved inside.. drank and all.. then suddenlly the lights went off and yeah a suprise cake was there.. honestly i didnt expect it to be even there lor.. I thought just talk and drink mana tau got birthday cake so they sang the song then some of the people in Station one sang the birthday song for me too.. then after that i made my wish and blowed the candle off then i cutted the hair and then they started putting cream on my face lorrr.. then Michelle wiped the cream off for me !!! WHAHAHAHA.. nothing to be big fuss about.. hehehehe.. so after that talk talk talk then around 12am everybody went back lor.. Offically my birthday is over.. and today is Tan U-Mae's birthday.. so happy birthday U-mae!! hehehe.. well i didnt expect my birthday to be like this.. i expect it to be just gathering and talk and just yam cha? but not the cake and cup cakes.. thanks alot for the food Su ching made for me.. it was really great and filling.. and Thanks Robyn for those cup cakes to made for me.. they were just nice not too sweet not too bitter or not too salty.. hehehehe.. and thanks alot to William, Michelle, Roy, Colin, Topac, Wynesse, Gavin, Sam and Khairul for the night you just did for me. Thanks for all the wishes. I didnt really expect for my birthday to be that happy because of what just happened to me not long ago.. but well i enjoyed myself and im grate and thankful for what had happened.. so U-Mae even how bad your day was never think that your birthday is gonna be a sucky one maybe its gonna be great? you dunno anything yet.. you dunno whats coming.. anything might just pop out. hehehehehe.. so enjoy your birthday that is today 6th of september 2008. And Cheryllll WHY TAK DATANG.. i sedih know.. sad sad lorrrr.. and Lauren youu ahhh.. not nice one lor.. wahahahaha.. thanks laaaaaa !!!! Actually i typed the first part out yesterday around 1.17am and its now 6th of september 3.06 am and im completing the rest.. and im going to bed after this. I just wish i could spend nicer time. Hehehehehe. Thank you very much ! And lastly sorry to Soya, Funky, Sze Guan, Kavin, Hasouk and Gwen that i could not hang out with you all today. Hehehe.

I will change.

I have to keep on improving myself. I change to keep on changing myself to be a better person. I really want it back so i must really work hard for it now. I realised what i have done wrong and what is there else to do than improving and be sorry? I have to work hard on myself so i can be worthy enough for it. I really want it back. I will do whatever it takes to get it back. I dont mind how hard it takes me because im willingly to risk my life for it. Because it is darn special to me. I dont wanna let go or give up that easily because i cant. And i wont do that because im not someone who gives up easily. I realised what i have done wrong all these while i will change myself keep on changing to be better for it. I wont back off i wont give up. Because i dont wanna let go of my chance. I dont wanna give up on my chance. I dont wanna lose it. I dont wanna regret that i didnt do all those. I really want it back ! Please I really want it back to show how much have i changed and realised ! Please and please and please.

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Exams are on its way.. Sports are on its way.. Everything is coming and i have lost my interest in them. I have too lost interest in blogging. My heart is getting numb and numb day by day till i dont really care for anything anymore. I dunno what to do but im trying my best to cope up it all back. Till then no blogging until i feel like it.